Holiday Cheer

Four days before Christmas Maya and I decided to have an impromptu girls night out. I told Maya about how Rachel told our Aunt about Hunter. Every time my phone rang and it was my mother I figured this was the big conversation. But my mother have yet to say anything to me and I'm not going to bring it. We decided to take the train to Hoboken, New Jersey and party. We met up with Ariel one of Maya's hairstylist from her salon.

By time we arrived to the first bar it was a quarter to mid-night. The place was packed and everyone was already drunk. Highly intoxicated girls screamed Merry Christmas to those that walked pass while equally drunk men held mistletoe up trying to get a random kiss. The atmosphere was wild and this is what we wanted. Since we were the only ones basically sober we had to catch up. We bee-lined our way to the bar and order Long Island Ice Tea drinks and tequila shots. We were taking no prisoners that night. “This is to all the women who like to fuck!” Maya shouted our first toast of the night. After we downed our shots it was party time. Ariel and Maya got into the action quick dancing and mingling. I hung back a little and watched the action. Several men came up to me but I wanted to have a date with my Long Island Ice Tea. As I rocked to the music, I realized that my drink was empty. Looking at my watch we hadn't been there no more then 20 minutes. Back to the bar I went for my second drink. After dancing a few more songs Maya and Ariel made their way back to our table with a string of men following them and a tray of tequila shots. “This is for the women who doesn't give a fuck!”

We, the entire crew that we picked up in the bar, decided to leave the bar not after taking two more shots and go the bar across the street. The great thing about Hoboken is that all their bars are all on the same street. Everything is walking distance. As we entered there was a live band playing a song that I had never heard of. But at this point no one cared, we race to the dance floor and started dancing. After more shots and more Long Island Ice Tea's it was 2am and the bar was closing. In two hours I had three Long Island Ice Tea's and 5 tequila shots. Some would say that I was drinking my problems away, I would say that I was having fun.

As we was leaving the bar Ariel was making out with guy and wanted us to come back to his apartment. Even in my drunken state I knew that wasn't the best thing to do. After Maya and I put Ariel in a taxi we started walk (barely walking) to the train station. Feeling vibration in my back pocket, I looked at my phone. “It's Hunter what she I do?” I whispered to Maya. “Why are you whispering drunk lady.” Maya replied back. Laughing I picked up the phone. “Hello.” I was trying to sound sexy and not drunk. What I accomplished was me sounding crazy. “Are you okay?” Hunter asked. “I'm good baby, how are you?” Maya started talking to some guys that was passing us. “Have you been drinking?” When Hunter and I was in Vegas I did some drinking. He became very protective because I can get very flirtatious when I drink. “Just a little bit. Maya and I are in Hoboken. We're getting ready to get a train to go back into the city.” Not realizing what was going on Maya screamed into the phone “Hey Boo.” Laughing at her silliness, “I'm coming to get you both. You shouldn't be taking the train home.” I tried to tell him that it was okay but he wouldn't take no for an answer.

Hunter arrived in Hoboken in 20 minutes. I was a bit nervous because he was going to meet Maya for the first time. What do I say? Do I introduce them like were just friends? My high level of alcohol didn't allow me to fester on the questions. When got into his car Maya, Hunter, and myself all started laughing at the awkwardness of the situation. It was a scene right out of a romantic comedy. Maya and Hunter chatted like they were old friends. No one brought up how Hunter and I knew each other. At Maya's apartment Hunter walked her upstairs to make sure she got in safe. I started to give him directions to my place then stopped. He can't know where I live. This was apart of our arrangement. When I told him about my separation I also told him that I moved into a “new” apartment. I asked Hunter to let me take a taxi home but he wouldn't hear it. When we arrived at my place, he started looking at my pictures of my friends and family and I stood in the middle of my living room waiting for him to leave but he didn't.

Realizing that he wasn't leaving I got into the shower to wash the drunk-ness off. Once I got out the shower Hunter was laying in my bed looking yummy. To drunk to have sex I got into bed and fell asleep in his arms. 

The next morning I woke up with Hunter Smith in my bed.

Happy Holiday's

Happy Holiday's Lovers,


I hope that everyone is spending time with their loved ones and making special memories.  I will update the blog on December 26, 2011. Enjoy this special time.

XOXO,
Victoria

A broken bond

Previously on Thoughts of a Mistress:

My mother is constantly worrying about me. She has no idea that a man name Hunter is in my life. (Unanswered Questions)

***

The knock at my door startled me. I was sitting with my friend, Adrienne Carter and going over her new bottle designs for the launch of her hair care product. When I opened the door my cousin Rachel was standing there with an guilty look on her face. “Can I come in?” Her voice was shaking. She neither called or text that she wanted to come by. Watching Rachel my intuition told me something was wrong. Very wrong. Her usual calm and confident exterior was gone. Today she looked like a teenager who was caught cheating on their math test.

End Results

Previously on Thoughts of a Mistress

I felt completely guilty about having an affair with a married man. Plus I thought I was pregnant. (Guilty)

***

I made an appointment with my doctor cause I need to know some important information. I'm sleeping with two different guy. I'm not going to try and sugar coat that. One whom I've known for a couple of months and the other one I've know for years, but never in a sexual way.

I realized that I started my relationship off with Tim by lying and cheating on him with Hunter. Or was I cheating on Hunter with Tim? Hmmmm.

Total Satisfaction

Prevously on Thoughts of a Mistress

I connected with a man from my past. (Best of both worlds)

***

As I slowly rocked back and forth on top of Tim I watched his facial expressions. His eyes was closed tight and his mouth was shaped in an o. We had been hanging out at his place all evening. I was nobody's fool the atmosphere was set for fucking.

Damned if I do... Damned if I don't

Previously on Thoughts of a Mistress:

My cousin told me that I should access my inner allure. I had no idea what she was talking about (Inner Allure)

***

“What if he's lying? What if he's trying to get a reaction out of me?” I asked Rachel. She was hiding behind several name brand shoe boxes, pink and silver shoe Christmas tree ornaments, and glitter. We were the only two people left in her store. The employees had left early to do their own Christmas shopping. I was helping her with her holiday inventory and decorate the store. “You've been on your computer all day. You need to be around people. You need to exercise your social skills” Rachel told me earlier in the day. For the last couple of hours I wasn't exercise my social skills but my ass and thighs was getting one hell of a workout.

To break up or not to break up? That is the question

Previously on Thoughts of a Mistress

Hunter sent me a thoughtful letter (A letter to Victoria)

***

Hearing the ringing of my phone woke me from my sleep. 2:03am. That's what my clock on my nightstand read. I had only been asleep for two hours. Tim and I went to a children benefit concert in Central Park. It was a fantastic night. We danced and laughed with our mutual friends and strangers. Throughout the night I would remind myself how great it was not to have to hide behind close doors. It felt good,less stress, not having to hide. The night was started perfect and ended perfect .

Grabbing my phone, extremely annoyed, I read the text message.

Hunter: I've totally fallen for you.

High Glitz Lounge (Beauty's Ink) -- revision

Previously on Thoughts of a Mistress

I decided on what business I wanted to start. (Viva Las Vegas). Hell I knew in this new phrase that I would learn new things about myself, but I didn't know how much (Genesis)

***

Standing in front of my mirror in my attorney's bathroom I looked at myself in the eyes. The woman that was staring back at me was one that I didn't recognized but I liked the way she looked, walked, talked, and presented herself. I was falling in love with this woman. She was different from the magazine advertising agent. She had a permanent smile on her face, her eyes was sparkled, her skinned glowed and she had more swag in her step. The extra pounds that hung around my mid section was slimmer, my round face still held its structure but my neck and shoulders are trim. Before my Vegas trip I decided to remove my extensions and wear my hair in a crop sexy bob.

Private Reality

Previously on Thoughts of a Mistress:

I met this wonderful married man Hunter Smith on Ashley Madison website. We began a sexy affair. Only my cousin (Rachel) and friend (Maya) knows about Hunter. Hunter decided to take me to Vegas because of my separation from my (fake)husband and getting fired from my (real)job.

***

“You've joking right!” Rachel screamed with laughter, she could barely hold in her drink. “You're on birth control! How could you not know.” Maya was sitting on the other side of Rachel eyes wide and shaking her head. We were drinking inside the seductive Madame X bar on Houston street.

I didn't realize that getting my monthly cycle would be the major point during and after my Vegas trip.

VEGAS!!!!

Hello Everyone,

First, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It means so much to me that you are following and enjoying it.  It has been so wonderful for me share my thoughts. Frightening at times, also. 

Thank you for your kind words via email, Facebook or twitter. You have given me another reason to keep writing.  As you know Hunter is taking  me to Vegas.  I will be in Vegas from November 27 - December 1st. I won't be able to update the blog until I get back. He has no idea that I'm writing the blog and I don't want to take a chance of him finding out about it. 

But I will be tweeting randomly throughout the day. Follow me @mistresthoughts.

Take care and remember send me your love stories I would love to read them,
V


 

Unanswered questions

There's always a rush of excitement that goes through my body when I see the skyscrapers in New York City from the airplane above. Looking down below at the city that I used to be so foreign to me, I fall in love with the city all over again. New York City, my home. When I was younger I use to tell my family “If I could make it to NYC then my life would begin.” I didn't understand or know what I was looking for but I knew that whatever it was it was in NYC.

Returning to Brooklyn from visiting my family for Thanksgiving in New Orleans,

Confirm or Cancel Part 2

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Today

Hey,

I hope this email finds you doing well and your day is going great. I was a little hesitate to write this email. Considering that my personality is laid back and chill, I didn't want to come across as the crazy side chick.

Confirm or Cancel

“I understand what you're saying. But I don't think that I should have to settle for just anything!” I said to Maya. We were in the drama room and you could cut the tension with a knife. I couldn't imagine a moment in our friendship where Maya and I misunderstood each other on such a high level. We've always been able to balance our friendship. We could always asked each other very personal questions and spoke freely about anything but every now and then the planets wouldn't be align correctly and our scales would be off balance, like today.

Moments

If my cellphone could print out text messages based on my life it would probably give an accurate account. It's the only entity that knows my day to day life. The ups and the downs. The secrets. The dreams. My daily reality. A few day's ago my cellphone and myself found ourselves at a beautiful wedding in Mahwah, New Jersey. The bride and groom were friends of my date. My date: Tim Cox .

Viva Las Vegas

“I can't wait to enjoy you next week in Vegas.” Hunter whispered in my ear while I laid in his arms after making love. Looking up at him he had a huge satisfying smile on his face. He wanted to take me somewhere to relax, enjoy myself and get my mind together. To be my knight and shining armor.

Guilty

Sitting on the side of the bath tub nerves ran through my body. I couldn't believe it. Here I was waiting for the results of my pregnancy test. How could I be so stupid? We use a condom every time. But worst then the nerves I feel guilty. Guilty about having this affair with Hunter. Earlier in the evening he told me that last weekend was his anniversary. I really didn't want to hear that. But the reality of what I was doing to his wife started eating away at me. Regardless, of what I believe, he say's that he's married. There is a 50/50 chance that he has a wife. What type of woman have I become? I've always been a girls girl. I would stand by my female friends any day. I never trust a woman that doesn't have female friends. Usually that means she will sleep with any man including mine. I stay away from women like that. But I've become that woman. There's a reason that I've kept this relationship a secret. It's taboo and down right wrong.

But the icing on tonight's cake was that I talked to my mother. For the first time in my life I couldn't tell my mother about a part of my life. I've lived by the creed that if I couldn't tell my mother then I shouldn't do it. She's my first and only best friend. I didn't lie to her about Hunter I just didn't say anything. It would kill her if she knew.

I feel terrible.

As I wiped the tears away from my cheeks. I looked at the test results. Negative. With a sign of release I walked to my bedroom and crawled under the covers. Hoping that the still of the night will wash away my guilt.

Where do I want to go?

“You really don't have a case Ms. Charleston” the attorney over the phone said. “You are an at will employee. They can let you go or you can leave at any moment in time for any reason.” All morning I've been calling around to attorney's trying to see if I had a case. I know I was let go because Tasha didn't like me but she can't fire someone because of her personal opinion. Apparently, since I didn't have a contract the company is free to do whatever is in their best interest.

I was embarrassed and ashamed but all of my friends rallied around me and told me that if there was anything that I need to just let them know. That made me feel good. When I started telling my friends what happen. Tim would call daily to check up on me. When I told him what happen he was understanding and offered to help me look for jobs. He knew people that was in the advertising industry. When I told Maya the news her respond was “That BITCH!!”

Feeling depress and angry after talking to the attorney I decided to take a walk around my neighborhood. I was due to met Rachel that evening but I needed time to myself. The sun was shining. The streets wasn't as crowded as they would usually be since everyone was at work. I had been on this career path for a while. Yes, I love and enjoy advertising but is it time for me to start on another career path. Did I have to stay in advertising? Or even work for someone else? I've longed for the day's that I would work start my own business. Sometimes I think that I could start a whole new career.

Walking into Lovey's Accessories Shop I thought of Hunter. I haven't talked to Hunter in a few days. He knew what happened. He was very supportive and thought that I had the worst case of luck over the last couple of weeks. Separating from my husband and being fired. He offered to take me on a trip to clear my head. “Anywhere you want to go.” he said. Where didn't I want to go is more of the question. I remembered that I was suppose to met up with him tonight. Mistakenly I double booked myself. I decided to text him

Victoria: Hey babe, I won't be able to see you tonight. Hanging out with my family. I really want to see you even for a moment.

Hunter: You are bad

Victoria: LOL. What are you doing? What are you touching

Hunter: Working from home today. I'm getting ready to touch my dick

Victoria: Are you going to stroke it fast or slow

Hunter: Fast

Victoria: I want you to imagine cumming all over my 44DD size breast

Hunter: Yes, that's what I'm going to think of

Victoria: Good

Hunter: You have me so hot

Victoria: I can't wait to lick and suck you. I have a serious craving for you

Hunter: LOL. I want to see how long you can have my dick in your mouth.

Victoria: ooooooo I like challenges!!! Game on...I'm going to suck you until you explode

Hunter: I do not want to be addicted to your mouth

Victoria: Why not? It will make you feel so good

Hunter: I get addicted sexually. I can't let myself go there with you

Victoria: Let it flow

Hunter: I would want to fuck you all the time. I know me, lol

Victoria: That isn't a bad thing. I will fuck you day in and day out

Hunter: We are so perfect together

Victoria: Yes we are.

Hunter: See you soon boo bear. Can't wait to hold you

***

“Have you told your mom yet?” Rachel asked.

“Not yet. I have to have a plan before I tell her anything. You know my mother. Always have to have a plan.”

“I think you should do what you've always wanted to do and that's start your own business. Finding your inner allure isn't just about sexuality.”

I knew that if I wanted to take advantage of the situation that now was the time. I started to get a little excited about the idea of starting my own business. Rachel was talking about her clothing store when my phone buzzed.

Hunter: I can't wait for our romantic getaway. Where do you want to go?

Could this be real?

I couldn't believe the word that I was reading. Terminated. Tasha called me into her office earlier in the week. I wasn't sure what she wanted to talk about but knew that I didn't meet my quota this month. This wasn't the first time that I've came up under the quota. Usually if a person is three consecutive months short then management began taking disciplinarian action. When I turned my report in I wasn't too worried, I would make it up next month. Again, this wasn't my first time not meeting my quota. So when Tasha called me into her office I was stunned when she handed me a piece of paper that stated that I was being let go because of my lack of performance. Watching me read and comprehend the words in the letter, Tasha looked at me with satisfaction. “Is there anything you would like to say?” Tasha asked. There wasn't much for me to say. Without a word I walked out of Tasha's office, gathered my things and walked out the building. Leaving behind a place of certainty, walking into a unsure future.

Sitting alone in my apartment I couldn't believe what happen. Terminated. How could this be? I knew that Tasha wanted me gone. But why? I was a hard worker and I was great at my job. Who wouldn't want me as an employee?  I wasn't sure of my next move. I planned to be at this agency for a couple more years before I start to move up into a management position. I didn't have a 5 year plan. I figured I would make it up as I went along. But now that I'm without employment, now is a good time to start making a plan.

Later that evening I got a phone call from Tim. We talked over the last few days and made plans to get together the following week. Tim sense something was wrong and offered to come over. I really didn't want company but I didn't want to be alone either. I finally agreed for Tim to come to my apartment. 

I'm was sure what it was? Was it the sight of Tim or all of my emotions of the day came out. But when I opened the my apartment door and saw Tim standing there tears fell from my eyes, FAST. I began to cry harder and harder. My feeling was so hurt. How could a person be so mean? This was my job, my career. Tim rushed to me and pulled me into a protective and safe hug and let me cry. He didn't say a word, he just let me cry. Once I got myself together, we seat on the couch. “Do you want tell me what's wrong?” I shook my head no. I didn't want to explain the situation just yet. “It's nothing bad,” I told him “My feeling are just really hurt.” Tim said that he understood and didn't ask anymore questions. We watched a couple of episodes of the second season of West Wing and ordered takeout. After making sure I was okay, Tim left for the evening. I crawled into bed feeling a little better but still very hurt. Slowly as I drifted to sleep my emotions turned to anger.

As I was cooking breakfast the following morning, somebody knock at my door. When I opened my front door there was a delivery man with a beautiful display of twelve red long stem roses with a note: “Whatever you're going through, keep your head up. Don't let them break you. xoxo Tim” As a read the note butterflies began to fluttering in my stomach. Could this be the beginning of something real?

FYI

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: FYI

Major fight with husband. Need time apart. I'm so upset Wanted to let you know.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: FYI

Where is he? OMG... What happened?

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Fight

He's pissed about mine view with not wanting children. I don't understand, he's never acted like this. I don't know why he's pressuring me so much. This has never happened. He's never talked to me like the way he did tonight. Its like he thinks that I'm holding out on him. I'm just not ready! That's it. I told him it would happen in time. He wants me off of birth control!! I'm not going to be bullied into having children. He's soooo mad at me. I don't understand. What happened, what changed? We was suppose to go out of town this weekend. We decided not to take the trip together.  I don't understand!!!! Am I wrong?

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Meet me

No babe you're not wrong. I just booked us an hotel. I will text you the details. Meet me there in an hour. You need a shoulder to cry on.

Intense Chemistry Part 3

Payback is a bitch. Here I am thinking that I can handle the sexual side of an affair. Walking around accessing my inner allure. Thinking that I'm in control of this situation. Ha, Hunter knew all to well how to take back control. Hunter sucked and licked my pussy until I screamed, begging literally begging him to stop. Wrapping his arms around my tights so that I couldn't move away, he wouldn't stop pleasuring me. All night was about having his face buried between my legs. No intercourse was exchange that night. Not even a kiss. The only thing that was inside me was Hunter's tongue. When Hunter wanted to taste my pussy he did, no questions asked. I would wake up in the middle of the night feeling Hunter's tongue gliding across my inner tight making it way to my pleasure point. We didn't do much talking that night. He said everything with his tongue.

Best of both worlds

“So who's your husband?” Maya asked laughing. I hadn't seen Maya in a while. With our crazy schedules and dates we haven't had our standard girl's night. I missed our talks. Our lives is filled with drama. We often call her living the drama room. Good drama, bad drama, nonetheless drama.  When one of us is having a life issue we meet in the "drama room".

“You remember my friend Tim? I'm using him as a inspiration for my husband.” I smiled. Inspiration in terms of looks, background, and education.

Shaking her head, “Didn't you just go out with him?”

“Yup and had a ball.” Flipping through the current issue of Koutour Magazine my mind drifted to Tim.

Tim hadn't changed since the last time I saw him. He was still personable and fun. He made me laugh throughout the night, as always, but he was different. Mature. When I met Tim a couple of years ago, he was the crazy college boy that everyone knew and would do bonehead things in order to get attention. But the Tim that I went out with yesterday was different. Easy going, but he hadn't lost his sense of humor. Not only was his personality different, he shaved his head, grew facial hair and added nothing but muscle to his arms and chest. He was pleasing to the eye. After the concert we went to an all night restaurant to catch up and talk about the concert. I had to stay late for work so I had to meet him at the stadium. Tasha was watching everyone (by everyone I mean me) like a hawk. I had to perform nothing but excellence everyday. Tasha was out for blood. My blood.

At the end of the night Tim walked me to my door. Standing there I felt like a teenager waiting for her first kiss because I didn't know if he was going to kiss me. “You look great, I've been meaning to tell you all night.”  Throughout the night I notice Tim checking out my ass and boobs.  A huge smile came across my face. I've been working out hard over the last few weeks. There was definitely a change in my body. Tim gave me a strong and close hug and kissed me on my cheek. “I will call you tomorrow.” he said with a sexy and confident smile. Not feeling disappointed I knew that I would see him again, soon. This was a great date.

The sound of my phone buzzing brought me back to the drama room.

Hunter: I miss u. Wish I could lay next to you tonight.

My date with Hunter was tomorrow night. We're spending the night and all the following day together. Since it was a weekday he said that he took the day off. I was working from home that day.

“You know what I'm trying to figure out?” I asked Maya. “Hunter told me that he puts his son on the bus every morning to go to school cause his wife has to go to work early. We've had 3 all night dates and they all have been during the week. Who puts his son on the bus?”

“ooooooo good question! Do they have a nanny?”

“I don't think so. He's never mentioned one. And also, what wife would be okay with her husband being gone all the time. I understand for work but come on.  He's been on several business trips and spends nights with me. Then he tells me he gets off work at 6pm goes to the gym for 2 ½ hours and is in bed by 10pm.”

“So when does he spend time with his son?” Maya asked the exact same question I've been thinking. “Well he's a liar bottom line. He's a cheater. He can be lying to you about everything.”

“Why would he lie!!!!!. There's no need to lie.”

“Why are you lying to him that your married.” Maya questioned

She was right. I had my reasons for lying and probably so did he. It was hard to think of Hunter as a liar but he was and so was I. This relationship was finding out about me. I couldn't do that hiding behind a fake marriage. I decided to end my fake marriage. I came up with a plan that would give me the best of both worlds. Hunter couldn't have me 100% emotionally but I would still have my freedom to do what I want in his eyes. I would start executing my plan tomorrow.

Karma's Job

I love my job. I really do. Not only do I love it, I'm extremely good at it. I've been in advertising for over 10 years. Going out, meeting people and helping them get their ads inside our roster of glossy lifestyle magazines is exciting. I meet some interesting entrepreneurs and get to try all types of new products and services. It was by accident that I ended up in this career. My aspirations was to be a elementary school teacher, but spending a summer as a camp counselor was proof that I didn't have the patience to work with children daily. Three weeks into the camping session I called home and told my parents that I was leaving. Not proud of my decision but I couldn't take it no longer.  As a true Spartan of Michigan State University I would read the State News every weekday. In the back of the classified section was a small ad that read the State News was hiring advertising representatives. I applied and got the job. I was a natural. The next semester I changed my major to marketing.

But there are days like today that make me want to change careers or better yet change company's. Recently the company hired Tasha Logan as an account executive. Basically she is my boss. From day one Tasha was a true bitch to me. Loafing herself over me, creating unnecessary protocols in the department just to prove that she is the boss. Today three of my clients called the office and wanted to expand the number of ads they would put in the magazine. I was out signing up other accounts so I couldn't take the call. Tasha took it upon herself to direct them to another representative not only did lose the I commission, I have to share the upcoming commission with the other representative.

When I heard the news I was completely upset. Pissed was more like it. Hunter's timing couldn't have been perfect he called at the same time I heard the news. I explained the situation to him. Being super sensitive he asked if I wanted to meet him for an impromptu dinner in New Jersey. Of course the answer was yes. As I gathered my belongings to leave the office for the day Tasha asked me to come into her office. Smiling to myself I'm thinking she's going to apologize for her mistake today. “Victoria, you are one of our best representatives. But I have to say, I'm disappointed in how you handled yourself with your clients today.” I went blank. What did she just say?  The only thoughts in my head were “WHAT THE HELL!!!” She continued by saying that I should have been in the office when my accounts called but since I was out “entertaining” I lost the accounts and made the company look unprofessional. Bullshit! Looking Tasha straight in the eye. Woman to Woman. “You know this isn't about my accounts. I'm good at what I do and you want me gone. So since you can't find fault in my work you're making up excuses to make me look unprofessional. But it's not going to work.” Standing up I grab my things and begin walking to the door. “Victoria?” Glancing over my shoulder “Please begin to prepare you quota for next month. Everyone must meet their quota” She winked.

Leaving the wicked witch of the East to her own finger to fuck herself. I grabbed the train to New Jersey where Hunter was waiting for me. As we drove to the restaurant he listen to me moan and groan about Tasha. Every now and then he would give me his opinion or advice. Throughout the ride we held hands and at stop lights we would share in a passionate kiss. Inside the restaurant I took a break from my madness and drama and asked about his day. He explained that since he spends most of his time in Morristown (which is 1 hour away from the city) his company is offering him a company apartment to stay in while he's working. Our own little love nest he called it. I hadn't decided if I was going to dissolve my fake marriage but this new information had my scales tipping to one side.

Driving back into the city I asked Hunter to drop me off at my work building. I wanted to send out an email to all my accounts having them call me directly for further assistance. Tasha's last words wasn't a helpful gesture it was a threat. Kissing Hunter he whispered in my ear and told me everything would be okay and he couldn't wait to see me later this week.

Walking into my building I figured how ironic that my professional life is becoming uncertain. Is this karma's way of getting me back for having an affair?

Let's the emotions flow

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Hey Sweetheart

I still cannot get you off my mind. I know I need to be more professional about our situation but you've left an incredible impression on me. Was that your intention??? I hope your day is going wonderfully so far.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Nothing bad can come from this

Hey Babe,

I told you before that I want you to be happy and satisfied. Think about me, lust about me, desire to be with me. We don't have to manage this like our careers. Let the emotions flow, as scary as that seems. Remember nothing bad can come from this. It's good to know that you are enjoying me. It will make our meetings even more special.

You are on my mind too. I cannot lie. I replay our time together often. Especially our pillow talks.

V

***

Hunter and I have sent tens of dozens of emails to each other that have described our feelings but these particular emails left me feeling light and happy. I'm nervous with excitement about the ideal of Hunter thinking about me. Imagining him thinking about me while he is on his way to work or drifting off to sleep. I couldn't hardly wait for the next date, cause I wanted to be with him. Touch him, smile at him, talk to him. Looking at myself in the reflection of the taxi's window I knew what was going on. The signs are there. There are feeling growing inside me for Hunter. I thought about Hunter too, a lot if I'm truthful. It's fun having someone send you sexy emails and call you at night to say good night. My mind is telling me that those are the things that boyfriend's do but with my career I don't have time for a boyfriend. I like having a "part-time" boyfriend, if that's what I will call Hunter. I know that its crazy for me to develop feelings but why not? As long as I don't have the expectations that he will leave his wife then I'm okay. Right?

But more important then having feelings for him I'm starting to like him as a person. The guilt of lying to him about me being married is starting to weigh on me. Since we are developing a friendship Hunter would ask me questions about my husband and our background together. I answered his questions but they are all lies. What if by chance he found out that I wasn't married? Then what? I've thought about coming clean and telling him the truth but that thought left quickly. How do I get out of a fake marriage? I didn't want to call Maya or Rachel and ask for their advice just yet. Mostly, everything I've done with Hunter has been about my instinct and I want to continue that. If I chose to tell him that I'm not married it would be based off my own decision.

These thoughts continued to run through my head as I walked up the step to my apartment from the gym. My phone began to vibrate looking down I saw a text message Tim Cox. Tim and I went on a couple of dates a few years back but nothing developed. We met through mutual friends. He wasn't my type and I wasn't his type. We still talk and hangout every now and then.

Tim: Hey u. What's new? I have an extra ticket to the major concert next week. Want to go?

Victoria: YES!!!

This should be fun. I always have a great time with Tim. My mind wondered back to Hunter, leaving Tim and the concert as a memory. We set up another date early next week. Whatever my decision was about annulling my fake marriage it had to be done soon.

Intense Chemistry Part 2

Walking on the treadmill sweat dripped off my face as I looked into the mirror a shy smile came to my face. “What are you smiling at?” The sexy stranger walking on the treadmill next to me asked. “Nothing.” I said with a even bigger smile. I had my little secret. As my inner thighs ached it was a beautiful reminder of last nights events. Remembering the way I explored Hunter's body with my tongue. Nothing was scare nothing left pure. I was in control. It was my turn to be aggressive. I didn't let the usual body images distract me.

When Hunter walked into the hotel room before the door was closed I unzipped his pants and began licking his dick. He came at attention quickly. Licking, sucking bringing him to his first orgasm of the night. Hunter could barely walk to the bed. “I can only stay for a couple of hours.” he stated “That's fine, that's all I need you for.” Hunter looked at me out the side of his eye but then gave me a smile “You're my bad girl.” He tried to reach out for me but I would let him touch me. He was under my control...

“Do you live around here?” The stranger asked. I was walking to the front desk to get me a bottle water. Since I don't workout I wasn't sure of the workout gym accessories. Sure I've seen women caring big bags to the gym and never really cared what's inside. “Ummm. No I work around the corner.” As I walked away I remember I was finding my inner allure. I turned around and gave him a little smile. Looking back at this man he stood 6'1, hazel colored eyes, with a slim body. He smiled and walked to locker room.

...Riding Hunter gave me the sense of power, control, and satisfaction that I wanted. Having his hands squeeze my breast as I rocked back and forward felt electrifying. At one point I begin rubbing my clitoris. Our eyes locked. The look on his face was a cross between shock and joy. I could sense what was going through his mind “Is she really touching her herself in front of me?” For the first time ever when I reached my orgasm I didn't closed my eyes. I continued looking at Hunter as my body begin shaking and my breathing quicken. Hunter grabbed and squeezing my ass, he had reached his ultimate pleasure state too. “How do you do it? Go from good girl to bad girl” Hunter asked with his eyes closed.  We laid naked next to each other. Our bodies at totally relaxation.  “I just do what I want to do to you. No holds barred.” I replied “You're something else, girl. I'm done.” I had to smirk at myself. Little did he know that I had a bag of sex toys in the closet that I was planning on using tonight...

“My name is Anthony. What's your name?” The stranger asked holding out his hand. He was standing by the front door talking to another member. “Victoria.” I answered placing my hand into his, “It's my pleasure, Victoria.” I stood there looking at him. I could tell my one word answer made him uncomfortable. This was a man that knew his own inner allure. It was shining all over him.  “Would you like to get some coffee?” Looking at Anthony, he was cute but more important I wanted to know his relationship status. Would I start attracting married men now that I'm fucking one? “I think I will have to pass my clothes are sweaty and I want to take a hot shower. But you can give me a call later.” Watching Antony’s body language would let me know if he was married or a girlfriend. He begin to frigged a little “That would be cool. But I work nights, so I can call you during the day.” I smiled and we exchanged numbers. I knew I wouldn't call or take his calls. I'm not trying to date a herd of taken men. One is enough for me.

...The cock ring was around Hunter's penis vibrating on medium. I suck and sucked him hard. Enjoying the taste of his dick in my mouth.  Hunter screamed my name begging me to stop, but I didn't. I would stop when I wanted to. Right before Hunter came to an orgasm I begin licking the top of penis. The orgasm was like an volcano erupting. Slowly gliding my tongue from his stomach to his chest Hunter looked at me, smiled and kissed me on the forehead closed his eyes and went to sleep. I showered and came to bed. I was discovering my inner allure. The next morning Hunter and I woke up before sunrise and begin talking. We talked about everything. All questions was answered whether they were lies or not. He wanted to go to breakfast but I told him I had to get home to my husband (wink wink). He walked me downstairs and hailed a taxi for me. “Your husband won't be mad?” Hunter asked “Your wife won't be mad that you stayed out all night?” I questioned him back. He gave some excuse that I didn't really care about. As the taxi drove away, I felt incredible. But was this incredible feeling because of the sex or was it Hunter?

Inner Allure (revised)

Thinking about Hunter and the way he played with my body left me feeling wildly sexy. This was a sexiness that I haven't experienced in a long time. The feeling was powerful. It wasn't Hunter who gave me this power, it was me. Allowing myself not to censor every move and thought, it is liberating and powerful. I felt like my inner shine was breaking through.

I began to wonder is that why some women engage in for-bitten activities?

Meeting up with my cousin, Rachel Young. She knows a little something about dating married men. Throughout her 20's and 30's men have done everything for her including playing her rent to helping her launch an successful clothing store. Now at the age of 45 Rachel understands her power, how to use it and she's proud of it. I had no intentions on telling Rachel. I didn't want my family to find out. Not that Rachel would tell or anything.  But you never know.

“Why are you glowing?” Rachel questioned after the waiter brought our drinks. We sat at the top of a hotel roof bar. Rachel and I have always been close. She was more like a big sister to me. When I was in college I would visit her in NYC. I knew that I would move here one day.  For my graduation gift Rachel purchased me a one way ticket to NYC. She said that if I was going to move I should do it now. No job or apartment, I boarded the plane with all the hope in the world. It has been an learning experience but I wouldn't change it for anything.

“I don't have a glow, girl” I said to Rachel not trying to make eye contact. Apparently I wasn't very successful cause she gave me the “Who are you kidding.” look.

“Okay, I will tell you but this stays between you and me...” I launched into my story about meeting Hunter and how wonderful our night was. At the end of the story I asked “What should I do now?”

“Take it one day at a time and don't think to much about it.” Rachel simply said. That was simple but not simple to do. Since our night together, Hunter and I have spoken on the phone several times and have exchanged racy emails. We were in our own world. How do I not think to much about it?  "But I think you should cut it off.  You're not the type of woman that could emotionally handle an affair."

“Be careful, once you start having feelings for him then cut it off. You can't allow yourself to get so into him because he has a wife. Understand your power in this relationship.” There's that word again. The way I felt. “You can get anything and everything you want.”

“How do I do that?” I never thought about getting anything out of Hunter. I just wanted a fun relationship but this revelation opened my mind.

“You have to find your inner allure. What attracts himself to you? Every woman has an inner allure that can cause any man to do whatever she wants him to do. But as women we have to access it and cannot be afraid of it.” Rachel explained. “It a very powerful thing. When you connect to your inner allure you don't act out of emotions or conscience thought. You act of selfishness.  You make all of your decisions based off of what you want. Your desires come first. You might upset and alienate some men but those that are strong enough and willing will stay around for the incredible journey that you take them on. Those are the men that are privilege to being with you. Men loves BITCHES.”

This little secret had my head spinning I wanted just a relationship something fun, exciting. Now here I am talking about connecting to my inner allure. Was I up for the challenge? I needed a second opinion.

Leaving Rachel to head home early, we kissed our goodbyes, after she reminded me of our upcoming family reunion cruise.  I called Maya on my way home. I wanted her take on this whole inner allure thing.

“You just can't do the usual things that you would do with men. You have to be abnormal. Nothings normal anymore.”

Hmmmm...Nothing's normal...Connecting to my inner allure.

I decided to call Hunter. “Meet me at this hotel tonight. I wanna fuck.” I said as soon as he answered the phone. We hadn't set up our second date yet. This was a spontaneous move. I didn't know if his wife was around or even if he would pick up the phone.  “Umm, okay. I can be there in about two hours.” He replied. “That's fine, just come.”

After we hung up the phone, I felt weird but confident. Did I just connect to my inner allure? Not playing it safe. I headed to 48 Secrets Sex Toy Shop to pick up some fun toys to play with tonight.

The day after...

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: You wore me out

Thank you so much for yesterday. That was the best date. I workout this morning (and last night when I got home) but I have been lying around all day. I knew your young ass would be the death of me.

You are an amazing woman. You have me totally all in... thank you for the best time I've had in a while.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: 10 hours

Hey you,

Its been a lazy day over here too. Can't believe how much stress you relieved out of my body after one date (granted it was 10 hours), I can't imagine after several meetings.

I can't tell you how much I enjoyed you. Physically and mentally. I'm totally into the way you think and touch...

V
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Smile

You got me smiling over here. You're going to give me a big head.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Smile

You should have a big head. You are good at what you do!!!!!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Intense Chemistry Part 1

Meeting Hunter was a surreal moment. I was up early that morning thinking about the upcoming events. What if I didn't like him? What if he looked different then his pictures? Crazy thoughts ran through my mind. I knew I was looking for a man that was 5'11, shaven head and facial hair. But with a description like that you didn't know what you were going to get. Trying to keep busy, I began watching you tube videos. I came across a video blog called “Kinky is what Kinky does.” She had a ton of videos about sex. She was a kinky and the videos was entertaining.

To: Victoria Charleston

From:  Hunter Smith

Subject: Time

I wish that the time would go faster, LOL. I'm ready to be with you.

***

It was reassuring to know that Hunter was as excited about this meeting as I was. I begin dressing for my date. I prepared my outfit in advance as well as my body. The day before I had gotten a Brazilian wax, no visible hair. I wanted to make sure that when he tasted my pussy there was no hair in the way.  This was it. I was going to meet him. I text Maya all of the information to where I was meeting Hunter. I'm adventurous but not stupid. I was meeting a stranger. Butterflies grew in my stomach. Like always when I get nervous I masturbate. I took out my vibrator, put the speed on ultra high and brought myself to an orgasm in less then 5 minutes. Feeling a little relax I finished getting dress and was out the door. I was ready....

At the restaurant the chemistry between us was so electric that we barely touched our food. We greeted each other like old friends who didn't fuck in college but was ready now. We headed to the hotel that Hunter had reserved for us the day before. It didn't take long before we was devouring each others body. Kissing, licking, biting, touching unfamiliar places. We explored each others body. Hunter stayed true to his word. He enjoyed eating my pussy. Watching his head between my legs was a thrilling experience figuratively and literally. Never had a man brought me to such an intense orgasm just by his tongue.

My body melted to his touch, my pussy became wet from his licks, my nipples was hard from his kiss. We didn't have sex, we fucked. We fucked each other until there wasn't anything left. I felt like this was an outer body experience. This was happening to someone else. This happen to other women, not me. Hunter dominated the situation. The cool calm man from the restaurant was replaced with an aggressive man. He was strong but yet gentle

Keeping up with Hunter was no easy task. This is a man that works out six days a week for 2 ½ hours a day. His body is a sight of perfection. What I thought that I didn't measure up in I made it up in oral. Having his dick in my mouth he was under my control. I sucked him until he begged me to stop.

The sex was great, the conversation was great, the time was perfect. We forgot about the busy streets of New York. We were inside our own world. Just us. We vocalized to each other that we wasn't expecting this intense chemistry.

As we looked at each other we knew something else was brewing underneath it all. Now that we are into the heat of things would we be able to handle what's coming our way?

A letter to Victoria

V,

I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate the passion you have for this and it certainly has me excited. It's strange and weird that this has been going kind of easy for us both. I thought that when I began looking for this, it would be a lot more drawn out and suspenseful... The suspense portion is definitely holding to form but the long drawn out portion is non existent. I am way too excited about tomorrow.

I'm just hoping we can both live up to one each other expectations... I have all these high hopes and fantasies about you. I really have a lot of high hopes about what a relationship outside of marriage would be and who that person would be. It's amazing to me that you have surpassed all of my wildest expectations so far. The only thing I can say is that I can only be downhill from here right? lol Just kidding you know I'm playing around but honestly, I want to be everything you expect. I hope I can be a little bit more than you've imagined. It excites me that you cannot wait to touch me. Honestly you and I have been all grandiose but I think when we meet we will both be a little shy. It's strange for me because I am never shy.

You asked last night on the phone do I think we will have sex or not. I think we'll have fun together if we have sex or not. We have established a comfort level which is very important and I'm feeling like I can trust you. I would not jeopardize my life (mundane as it is) for just any woman. I'd like to spend time with “wifey” material. I am not about trashy women. Instead I prefer a lady who wants to be my personal whore and no one knows but me how freaky we are together. I am the same way, I like to look good so that no one knows my nerdy ass has been licking your ass hole while you cum. This is the long way of saying yes we will sleep together Friday and countless times after Friday. I think we'll be the best of friends reminiscing about this first date a year from now.....

If we establish trust we can have all of our fantasies answered without judgment or false expectations. Just fun, laughing and passion. Funny thing is it might just make both our marriages better. Lol



See you soon,
Hunter

The Lie

Interesting how a simple decision can change your life into a roller coaster ride. Your actions provide the twists and turns. Your emotions goes up and down in a split of a second. You want to get off the ride or even have it slowed down but then you realize you enjoy the ride.

Sitting in the back of a taxi headed to the Bronx to see my friend Maya Robinson I knew I was going to tell her about Hunter. I meet Maya five years earlier when we worked at the same company. We hit it off immediately and became close friends. Out of all my friends Maya is the least judgmental to the different and understanding to the unusual. But it wasn't Maya's lack of judgment that made me nervous. She had recently gotten out of a 10 year relationship with a man that cheated on her constantly. Many of nights I would get a phone call because she found new evidence of his unfaithfulness. How would Maya react? The situation hits home hard. I'm causing the same pain to Hunter's wife, if she ever found out, that those women caused my friend. Am I different from them? Those women wanted to take him from her. I don't. Hunter can stay with his wife. I have my reason's for having this relationship, but will Maya understand?

The taxi pulls up to her apartment. I pay the fare and text her to open the door.

“Hiiiiiii” Maya greeted me when I got off the elevator. Walking into her apartment I could smell food cooking in the kitchen. Maya is the only 29 year old that I know that cooks like a old southern grandma.

Before my nerves could get the best of me I blurted out “I'm meeting a married man tomorrow to have an affair with.” There it was out in the open. Now the only thing I could do was deal with Maya's reaction.

“What the fuck!! What do you mean you're meeting a married man tomorrow?” Maya looked dazed and confused.

“I'm meeting a married man tomorrow to have an affair with.” I repeated.

Staring at me like I’m a stranger with her almond shape eyes, “ How did you meet him?”

“On the website Ashley Madison. I saw his profile and emailed him. We've been talking and emailing each other for a while.”

Maya's shoulder's and facial expression relax as she digested the information. “Where are you going to meet him?”

“At a restaurant in mid-town but here's the thing,” I was nervous to revel my lie. A lie that I've been telling Hunter from the beginning. Now getting ready to say it to someone that knows me personally I'm a little embarrassed “He thinks I'm married.”

Unable to contain herself Maya laughed herself out of the living room chair. Laughing so hard that her 6'1 frame was bent over and hair fell into her face. Not necessary the reaction that I thought I was going to get, but a reaction never the less. After calming down just a little bit “Why does he think your married?” she asked.

“Because I told him I was.” I simply said.

Placing herself back on chair and reaching for her beloved Pepsi, “Why would you tell him that?” she giggled.

“Cause men what want they can't have. I'm tired of men thinking that since I'm in my 30's I'm searching for a man to marry. They think that cause I'm interested in them that I want to immediately marry them. Men get comfortable when they feel like the 'have you'.” I paused catching my breath “ I want to be in a situation where a man knows I'm off limits. I already have what he thinks I'm looking for so now how different will the situation be?”

“I agree.” replied Maya “Men do treat you in a differently if you are unattainable to them. They love the chase. Once you let your guard down that's when they start to dog you. What about his wife? Did you ask about her?”

“She's a lawyer and 5 years older then him. Apparently she's from money. Both of her parents are lawyers.”

“Well do what you got to do. But don't let me hear you saying that your in love with him. If I do then I'm going to have to kick your ass.” You have to love Maya for her honesty “So if you like this guy, what are you going to do with him?”

“Use him to my advantage.” I smiled at her

Cheating 101

I may be number two but I will not be forgotten, dammit. So I sent him a little sexy email to give him a visual...

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Sweet Dreams

Hmmmm...just the thought of your tongue slowly circling my pussy has me so wet. I can imagine your dick thrusting inside me. Slow and steady but as the heat rises its harder. Bring us to the ultimate orgasm. The anticipation of feeling you between my legs has my nipples hard and erect. Can you imagine me rubbing my breast? Wishing that my hands was yours. Watch visually as I suck and lick on my breast and move my hand down to my pussy. I slowly insert two fingers inside me. Rubbing and touching myself until I reach a climax. Mmmm. I'm waiting on you.

V

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Me time

This little email from you gave me some really good "me" time last night, I came so hard from the thought of your descriptions. I am forced to masturbate often so that I can be sexually fulfilled and I must say it was a pleasure having thoughts of you as I played with my cock. I start to salivate as I anticipate licking your body. I honestly, don't want a square inch of your body to be unknown to the feel of my tongue. I am totally whoreish (not a word) at the thought of us together. This is honestly going to be the kick start that I have needed for so long baby. It's actually going to be nice to have a friendly ear to talk to about life and the bullshit the usually ensues lol.
Hope your day is well so far..

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: V's Dictionary

According to V's dictionary:

whoreish (adj) describes a person who enjoys high level of sexual pleasure. :)

I'm looking forward to our date. I'm doubling up on work or the next two days so I can spend the afternoon with you.

Couple of questions:

1. What time are you usually home? I just want a ballpark so I'll know. I'm home usually between 6:30pm - 6:45pm. Over the summer I've gone to happy hour with co-workers some evenings so I might get home a little later. But I always let my husband know in advance.

2. If the chemistry is right, are we going to split the hotel bill? I don't want either of us thinking that's its our full responsibility financially.

I can't wait to meet you. Have a wonderful day.

V

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Enjoy talking to you

I will have the entire afternoon also. The end of the week works best for me anyway.

I am always in and out of town so there are no expectations on when I could come home as long as I have talked to the wife about it a day or so earlier. I know this is not pertinent to this conversation but I could even be out all night if I needed to be because I have the travel excuse built in and it is not out of the ordinary. Since this is our first meeting I do not want to be the person that has to leave. I have no idea when I will get enough of you... It is really routine for me to have to entertain customers and go to happy hours after work on any day. I am free till you are done with me... If things go well, when would you absolutely need to be home?

I am cool with splitting the room or alternating paying for the room. There will be a next time! Hint Hint

I am really excited to be finally meeting you too. I think we will hit it off but you never know, chemistry is a strange thing. The good thing about the way we've met is that we have the right to be happy with who we choose to spend this portion of our life with. No matter what, I have sincerely enjoyed talking to you and thinking about you...

I wish I would have known you last week, I feel like right now I want to capitalize on every possible opportunity to be with you...

I don't think I have ever asked you if you have ever had a man outside of your marriage before. You are a real go getter and seem to have thought this out very well. If you want something, there is nothing that will keep you from it.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Cheating 101

The latest for me to be home is about 8. If I would have known you last week I could have said that I'm trying to get a big account and have to "entertain" them or have late meetings with my partner. This is usual since we're expanding our market to other states. I just need to drop major hints, that I will be out.

I had a relationship before. Its was okay. Just sex. But he wanted me to fall for him even though he was in a relationship. It was nonsense to me. But, I learned two very important things:

Cheating 101: know your daily habits and never change them! That's how most people get caught not realizing their own behavior. If my husband started leaving earlier in the morning and not having his usual leisure Saturday morning. I would notice his change in behavior and start to ask why. When I was in college I knew my roommates schedule and she knew mine. If we didn't come home on time we were calling each other to make sure we're okay. Now that's a roommate. you're more in tune with your spouse.

Cheating 102: never give your partner a reason to ask "why". Keep things neutral and the same. If you don't understand this go back to cheating 101. LOL!!!

V

Am I fat? No, but...

Nervous, anxious, excited was all the emotions that I was feeling at 1:30pm. Hunter and I had arranged a phone meeting. The sexy emails and pictures began to weigh in on the suspension. Who is this man? The phone rings I look at the caller ID, its him. I took a deep breath, made sure no one was around to here my conversation, I then picked up the phone “Hello...”

Interesting...Our conversation didn't have that same sizzle that our emails had. I imagine that our phone's would blow up from the heat between us. Pleasant: yes; Sweet: yes; Passion: NOPE. Now you all know by now one of the reason that I'm entering into a relationship with a married man is for the passion.  If our phone conversation doesn't have the passion, how will the sex be? I understand that its our first conversation: the meeting stage, trying to figure each other out. But we clicked so much through email that at one point during the conversation I had to ask myself, was this the same person? We went through the pleasantries of our day and reiterated about our past. The call lasted about 20 minutes, if that.

A man's voice... I love a man's voice. When a man's voice is dripping with sex, masculinity, and power he can give a woman chills with just a whispers in her ear. Hunter's voice...I didn't care to much for it. It was masculine but not deep and sultry. It reminded me of a fun sunny afternoon in spring, not a hot, steaming summer night. I once dated a man whose voice was so sexy that I would call him in the middle of the night just to get a chill and wet. His voice was all types of yummy. But Hunter's it wasn't and that's so disappointing...

At one of those awkward silent moments, I asked what did he do after work. Hunter begins to explain that he goes to the gym for 2 ½ hours a day. TWO IN A HALF HOURS A DAY!!!! You've got to be kidding me. His body must look like an athlete. At this point I'm thinking, I'm not trying to fuck his voice. But reality begin to sink in. This information made me panic a little. I'm lying, it made me panic a lot. Am I fat? No. But I do have extra love handles to give out and more then a hand full of thighs. My stomach isn't exactly flat as an iron board. My breast size is 44DD. My daily exercise consist of walking up the stairs to my apartment. I will hail a taxi in a New York minute to get me from point A to point B.

That really mean and ugly voice inside my head started yelling, quite loudly, “He isn't going to like you. You're going to disgust him. He wants a size 6 and you're FAR from that” What do you do when you co-sign with the mean and ugly voice? I'm attractive, of course, but I could stand to lose some pounds. What to do? What to do? My inner diva voice wasn't speaking yet...

I began formalizing a plan in my mind to give him a heads up on my issues with my body but before I could explain anything to him, I took my position as number two, as his wife clicked in the phone and we ended the conversation  IMMEDIATELY...

"Yeah...that's what I want. PASSION"

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Expression

Good morning to me. That picture was hot! Thanks. I love that you are so freaky boo... I would really like to have an open and fulfilling relationship with you where you are free to express yourself sexually with me. I can say that because that is what I want. Honestly, there will be times we will wanna meet for drinks and a quick fuck and then eat a nice dinner after. I found some nasty pics to send you.... Are these OK? Let me know what gets u off and I'll do it. Muah... have a good morning..

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Passion

Your pictures are nice, VERY NICE...can I have a lick? The morning is a little crazy. One of those days. I like the idea of being open, but isn't that the whole reason of us trying to get together? If we wanted to have limits then we would stay in our marriages. There would be no need to step out.

My desire is a high level of Passion. Passion that can be felt through email. Passion that can be felt with a hug or a glance. Passion so electric that we are drawn to each other regardless of the situation or time. Limitless Passion. Passion so intense most people haven't experience it because of their fears, doubts and concerns get in the way. That's what I want. Passion. Passion that when you walk in the room I know that you're there. Passion so noticeable that silence is too loud. Yeah that's what I want Passion. Passion, that when were together colors are brighter and smells becomes sweet aroma. Passion that's what I want. Passion, that we can feel the lingering touch of each others lips when we are apart. Passion, that the memories bring a smile to our face. Passion so sweet that we realized that it all started with an email. That's what I want... Passion :)

V
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Visuals

I can say for certain that when I get your emails it makes me want you more and more. I feel like when we are messaging we are actually talking. I feel very much open to you and your desires. I feel like we are definitely looking/lusting for the same things. That Passion has been missing for so long I am afraid of how it will feel to be totally consumed by the thought of you and us. Thank you for unleashing this in me again..
Bust that day out superstar! You are constantly on my mind, I appreciate all of the visuals, they have me so fucking aroused and hot and hard... I wanna taste you wet..

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: :)

Hope your day is going well...don't worry about being consumed with me/us, nothing but good can come from this!

V

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Charming the Charmer

I am still thinking about those big pretty nipples of yours. I really enjoy your words. You have a masterful way of saying things that are just right to me. You have charmed the hell out of a charmer... lol

There is nothing bad that can come from this...

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: We've only begun

LOL!!! You haven't seen, tasted or touched anything yet. We've only just begun. Let the chemistry be right. No stress or drama. You will have a constant smile on your face and a hard satisfied dick.

What time do you want to meet? 2:30/3:00ish?

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Promise

That's good Friday at 2:30ish ... Right? I want you to smile also. I'll be fun... I promise.

Meeting Hunter Smith

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Hunter from Ashley Madison

I want to know more about you. I replied to your message but did not get a reply. Let me know if you are interested. I've attached pics. If you want more please let me know. Are you married?

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

Hi Hunter,

I didn't get your message, just this email. I'm 32 years old and live in Brooklyn with my husband of 7 and a half years. No children yet. I'm an advertising executive for a magazine. I've attached 2 pics of me.

Tell me about you.

V

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

Girl you are very attractive. I assume you thought my pictures were okay because you decided to email me back. I'm and IT director for design firm in Morristown, New Jersey and I live on the Upper East Side. I think my biggest concern is that I was hoping we did not know 1 another. It's a very small world know. You are very very cute and seem intelligent. What's next, this is new to me? What other questions do you have for me. Oh yeah, I've been married for 9 years and I have 1 son. So are you just bored out of your mind like me?
917-xxx-xxxx

Hunter

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

For starters thank you for the compliment. Yes I definitely liked your pics. This is my first time on Ashley Madison. I totally understand wondering if we know each other. I'm going to say no since I don't know anyone that works in New Jersey.

My marriage is ok. We don't have fun like we use too. We put off having children because we wanted to focus on our careers but now that's all we do. He's a good man but I miss the heat, the passion. Can you relate?

I guess we can email each other to get to know one another and when we feel comfortable then we can find someplace to meet.

V

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

As far as knowing 1 another I would definitely know if I have ever seen you before. My ultimate need is for discretion. I want to have fun but I don't want my business out there. I am very sensuous and sometimes I feel taken for granted. Just like you, I have a good woman but the passion is no longer there and has not been for a long time. It's kind of understandable these days and times people forget the little things. But most of all it would be nice just to get fucked sometime without all of the life drama lol. Lately it's been all about work for us too. It's actually nice to talk to someone out of my world and situation.
I am looking for someone married because I did not want to break up a home. I also like professional women who are go getters and know what they want. I like a real lady not a tomboy. It would be nice to have someone who has great conversation and has been places and done things. I actually never thought it would come to this for me so I'm kind of surprised at how this works. Obviously, I love talking sometimes I talk too much lol. So I guess the answer to your question in a long drawn out way, is yes lol I can relate to your situation. :-)
I have been on the site for a few months and I've met 2 people in person and it seems that no 1 sends recent pictures of themselves.  Ones I've met must of sent me pictures from 10 years ago. Lol This is weird for me. I was polite but I felt lied to so those meetings were short.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

Hahaha...SO is that your way of asking if my pictures are recent? The answer is yes! I took both when I was in Vegas last month.

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

Believe me, I am not so subtle. Lol I really just wanted to let you know that I've been on the site for a few months and met 2 people that did not work out, that's all. You are funny! U got jokes!

Are you getting a lot of emails? I think women on that site get bombarded. I think you'll have your pick of anybody you choose.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Hunter from Ashley Madison

Hey,

Well, I'm getting emails but from some weird people. One guy asked if I wanted to have a 3some with him and his wife. Needless to say I deleted that email, quickly. Not that there isn't anything wrong with a 3some but that comes with time. So what do you like do? How old are you? Tell me more about you.

My husband and I used to laugh a lot. That's one of the things that I liked about him. We would enjoy each others company without drama or stress. I sometimes think getting married took that away. Over the summer we've had conversations about our marriage. I miss laughing and great sex. Not just any sex, BUT GREAT SEX!!! Sex that have you thinking about it the next day. There's nothing like having a great conversation and then great sex. I guess we will get into all that later. Our desires, wants and needs.

I don't want stress or drama from this. A good time with a friend is what I'm looking for. Most men think that I'm going to fall for them and leave my husband. And trust me there wasn't anything sexual between us. At this time I don't plan on leaving my husband. You seem like you're looking for the same. A stress free situation. Someone to treat you well and enjoy their company.

Are we on the same page?

V

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Profile

What made you pick out my profile anyway? I hope it wasn't my funny torso picture.. lol I never got any calls or hits on that website until I took that photo, so I guess it was just something where people needed to see some sort of picture... I did not realize women were so visual. Lol
I'd like to think that it was my wonderfully eloquent profile write-up that got your attention.

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Homey Lover Friend

Actually, the funny thing is I think we're totally on the same page.
I like to laugh and I love to have sex. I'm into women who loves having sex also. That's weird to say because you'd be surprised at how many women are just not into themselves and how to feel good. I am really oral and therefore absolutely love the taste of a sweet pussy in my mouth, I like it so much that I can cum from eating pussy. Don't laugh at me. I just love having my mouth on a woman and feeling her move and wiggle because of what I am doing, I like to feel the wet pussy in my mouth and have been turned out since the very first time I have ever went down on a woman. The more comfortable a woman is, the more comfortable I feel and the more fun I have. I love for a woman to sit on my dick and take control you know? I mean really ride me the way it feels good to her.
I am really into long deep sensual thrusts where we both feel it all. I think with you, knowing that our time would be limited is going to turn me on even more. I love room service so I actually would only like a hotel that could bring me a great burger after several orgasms lol.  I like to feel my mouth all over a woman, it makes me harder and hotter. I love a woman who is a great kisser, to me its really a part of sex and a way to feel closer do a woman.
As for threesoms, if that were to ever come up for us, I'd like it to be after we are really comfortable with one another. This is something that I could never do with my wife, she'd never do it. To me, if we were really into one another to add another woman would be the equivalent of a sex toy. If you were pleased and I were pleased with a third person then I am game. I love to have you lay out and her her sucking your breasts while I lick your pussy. That would be fun. I'd get off on seeing a woman's head between your legs lol. Actually, the only porn I watch is girl on girl..
I am a 38 years old Aries and pretty much a Clark Kent  lol. I am funny and engaging and very charming, but right now this is my darker side, a side that I thought my wife would fulfill but has not been able to. The things I'm talking to you about now have only been thoughts and fantasies that I have been afraid to express to anyone. They have only existed in the deepest part of my mind maybe during masturbation while watching a porn.
I have always had a way with women in and out of bed. I am a gentleman with street edge lol. I was born in the south.... I went to the Howard University on a football scholarship and received a wonderful education while riding the hell out of the bench lol. I have no regrets though... I totally got the most out of my college experience and would not change any of it. I pledged a fraternity and got the best education afforded to college athletes at a wonderful institution.
I want to be able to have a homie love friend where nothing is off limits to us. Where we can create our own world of whatever we want. I think this is an open book and I'm actually a little excited at this opportunity, and very much intrigued about your ass. I dig your type, the unapproachable "all about business" woman with secrets. If you can let go I think well have fun.

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Homey Lover Friend

You enjoying oral sex is no laughing matter -- trust me! That's a complete turn on, as your profile picture and emails. My husband isn't into oral sex much. I have to take the blame on that cause I've always been a giver. Licking, sucking, moans...those are the things l enjoy. Giving pleasure. Understanding that sometimes it isn't always about me.

Fantasies can be tricky. We get married thinking that its limitless sex. I never questioned my husband thirst for sex. But I thought once we get married we would kick it up a notch. I would be his personal porn star. I just knew that he would come home and fuck me. I mean FUCK ME! Take control in the bed and we have sex that is so mind-blowing that we haven't realized the time or that we haven't answered our phones. Fucking/Sex so great that we are so completely lost into each other that the only two people that matter is us. But no, I feel that's off limits. I'm "wifey"! I can't show him that I want to masturbate in front of him while he's watching the game or giving him oral sex while he's on the phone. No, I have to be perfect.

I'm a woman not Barbie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...Some women have hang-ups about sex. Not understanding that they have to learn how to please themselves first before they can please a man. I know what I like and I'm not afraid to share my knowledge. As well learn about what you like and how I can increase your pleasure.

My husband likes to take me around his friends because I'm not "ghetto", I'm educated and "pretty". Two bonuses in his book. The fact that I'm thick adds to the allure. He knows that I'm not going to get drunk and dance on the table. I know my audience and I play to that and he enjoys it. I once told him at a party that I wanted to have sex with him in the bathroom and he went crazy. He was so nervous that someone heard me ask or would hear us.

My evenings are spent at home or with family. I can email from my phone. He would never notice since I'm always on it for business. Talking maybe tricky in the evenings. There are times that I have evening meetings that I can arrange where he won't think much about it. During the day I'm usually doing sales presentations or making calls. My day's are more flexible.

Let me know what you want and I will make it happen.

Let's have fun...

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Let's Meet

First of all we need to meet for lunch or coffee or something. I'm excited.. Sorry for the delayed reply I'm at the gym (see attached) (yuck) lol...
I have a really flexible schedule. I am all over the city all the time and don't have an office that I need to be at. I'm in Jersey, Brooklyn, Financial District and Philly a few days a week. When you can have lunch or drink or coffee holla at me. I can't wait.

Hunter

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

How about Thursday/Friday @ 2:30ish? Where?

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

That sounds good with me we know we can do it in Mid-Town right? Lol I'm good with either day do you wanna have a wonderful weekend and meet on Friday or do it on Thursday to have a wonderful Friday and the rest of the weekend? Lol

I'll pick a place, but you have to tell me how much time you have. I am kinda bourgeous when it comes to dining lol..

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Waiting

You got me waiting for emails from your ass. Lol wtf?

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

Hahahahahahahaha...Friday sounds good. I would like to have a great weekend after meeting you.

V

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

How about the Steak House on XYZ?

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

Maybe I should have mentioned that I don't eat beef or steak. I plan on eating you...

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

Um yeah you should have mentioned that you do not eat beef... helloooooo lmao! I am a calorie counter so I will eat a little of anything but I eat a lot of fish, salads and soups so what else sounds good to you? Did you notice I picked a restaurant that was attached to a hotel, just in case I could not resist tasting your hot ass? I do mean your ass too, I know what I said.. lol

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: RE: Let's Meet

Oh please, we've been talking about sex not food. The steak house is fine I won't eat steak/ pork or kiss you after you eat it, hahaha, but its ok. I can find something on the menu. My attention will be on you not the food.

If the chemistry is right between us then this is going to be amazing!!!!

Have you ever had a relationship outside your marriage before? And the reason I'm asking is because some people don't want to mention their spouse or ask about their day. There's boundaries in conversation. Reality life is separate from fantasy.

Thoughts...

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Other relationships

I had a relationship when I first got married, basically an unresolved GF that didn't quite end when I was married. I usually can get my jollies flirting with women lol. I know it sounds funny but I know there are plenty who'd love to have me take them but I never let it get that far (I get off on discretion). The last time I had a relationship outside my marriage it did not end well. She was single and had nothing to lose. I was dumb it should have never gone as far as it did. So the long answer is yes I have.
I am on the fence over talking about home a lot but if you have something to get off your chest I wanna listen. I'll do the same. That's what friends should do. Right?

You are gonna make me give up red meat because I do not Wanna do anything that would jeopardize me kissing you. I eat 8 oz off meat daily so if I miss meat for a meal its no big deal. What's your favorite food? What food is irresistible for you. Mine are Hershey's bars and Pizza. I should not eat either one but I love them!

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Other Relationships

You really count calories huh? I'm pretty boring when it comes to food. I don't try to many new foods. Which is funny cause I love spontaneous activity. Rituals bore me. But food, I very seldom change. I know what I want at every restaurant and get the same thing. I'm more a beverage girl. Fun, sexy drinks excite me!

Finding someone to chill with is difficult. That's why its important to find someone that is on the same wavelength as you. Who understands and knows the boundaries, on both ends.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

To: Victoria Charleston

From: Hunter Smith

Subject: Good Night

Yep I really count calories... I like to eat so much that I need to keep my appetite in check.
I figured wherever we go we'd. Sit and drink for a few hours lol. You seem fun so far.
Night babe.... I can't wait to hug you and honestly taste those pretty tits.

Have you ever been to this restaurant?

To: Hunter Smith

From: Victoria Charleston

Subject: Good Night

Yup I've been there. Night, talk to you tomorrow.

V